Groundhog Day Script Somebody asked me today... "Phil, if you could be anywhere, where would you like to be?" I said to him, "Probably right here. " Elko, Nevada. Our nation's high at 79 today. In California, they'll have warm weather tomorrow... gang wars and some very overpriced real estate. Up in the Pacific Northwest, they'll have some very tall trees. It will be clear across the Rockies and the Great Plains. But look out, here comes trouble. Oh, boy! Front coming our way. Look out. What will that mean to us in the Three Rivers area? One of these big blue things! This cold, frigid, Arctic air. This big mass out of the north. It will meet up with all this moisture coming out of the Gulf... mix together at high altitudes and cause some snow. It won't hit us here in Pittsburgh. It will push off and hit Altoona. Close call. Let's take a look at the five-day forecast. Nothing to be too scared about. Bundle up warm, but leave your galoshes at home. I won't be here for the : . Tomorrow is Groundhog Day, and I'm going out to Punxsutawney... for our country's oldest groundhog festival. According to the legend, tomorrow, February ... if the groundhog sees his shadow, we'll have six more weeks of winter. - Keep your fingers crossed. - Sounds like a lot of fun. This is your third year in a row isn't it? Four, Nan. Thanks, Phil. Up next: Diane Kingman looks at sex and violence in the movies. Stay with us. - We're clear. - Have fun in Punxsutawney. For your information, Hairdo... there is a major network interested in me. That would be the Home Shopping Network. Thanks, Larry. Go wait in the van. That was nice. "Big trees. " Stop, Henny. Can you handle the : or not? If you don't want to rush back, I can do the : tomorrow. I want to stay an extra second in Punxsutawney? Please! Rita thinks it would be great to stay for some of the other events... get some incredible footage. The people and the fun, the excitement. You haven't worked with her yet. She's really nice. She's gonna be a really good producer. You guys will have fun. She's fun, but not my kind of fun. I will be here for the : . Rita. Can you keep a secret, Larry? I'm probably leaving PBH. So this will be the last time we do the Groundhog together. What's wrong with the Groundhog Festival? In San Diego, I covered the swallows returning to Capistrano six years. Someday somebody will see me interviewing a groundhog... and think I don't have a future. I think it's a nice story. He comes out, and he looks around. He wrinkles up his little nose. He sees his shadow or he doesn't see it. It's nice. People like it. You are new, aren't you? People like blood sausage too. People are morons. Nice attitude. Look in the mirror and see what you look like doing that groundhog thing. For me? Once? He comes out and looks at his little shadow. - Would you like some blood sausage? - I like blood sausage. Rita, I can't stay here. - Prima donna. - I'll handle it. What's the matter? I hate this place. I stayed here two years ago. I was miserable. - It's a fleabag. I'm not staying here. - You're not staying here. I'm not? Larry's dropping me off. I booked you in a nice bed-and-breakfast. Great. I think this is the trait of a really good producer: Keep the talent happy. Anything I can do. Would you help me with my pelvic tilt? Within reason. Would you like to have dinner with Larry and me? No, thank you. I've seen Larry eat. Get your sleep. I'll see you in the morning. Don't be late. Did he actually call himself "the talent"? Okay, campers, rise and shine. Don't forget your booties because it's cold out there today. It's cold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach? Not hardly. You can expect hazardous travel later with that blizzard thing. "That blizzard thing"? Here's the report. The National Weather Service is calling for a big blizzard thing. They are. But there's another reason why today is especially exciting. Especially cold. The big question on everybody's lips- On their chapped lips. Do you think Phil will come out and see his shadow? - Punxsutawney Phil. - That's right, woodchuck chuckers. It's Groundhog Day! - Get up and check that hog! - Come here, groundhog! Good morning. - You off to see the groundhog? - I am. Do you think it will be an early spring? I'm predicting March . Good guess. I think that actually is the first day of spring. Did you sleep well, Mr. Connors? I slept alone, Mrs. Lancaster. - Would you like some coffee? - Is there any possibility... of getting an espresso or a cappuccino this morning? I really don't know. How to spell "espresso" or "cappuccino. " This looks fine. - I hope you enjoy the festivities. - I'm sure I will. There's talk of a blizzard. We may catch a break and have that blizzard blow by us. All this moisture coming up out of the south... will probably push on east of us. At high altitudes it will crystallize and give us what we call snow. Probably will be some accumulation... but here in Punxsutawney our high will be about today, teens tonight. Chance of precipitation about percent today and tomorrow. Did you want to talk about the weather or were you just making chitchat? - Chitchat. - See you later. - Bye. - Will you be checking out today? Chance of departure today: percent. Phil Connors? I thought that was you! How you doing? Thanks for watching. Don't tell me you don't remember me. I sure as heck-fire remember you. - Not a chance. - Ned Ryerson! Needlenose Ned. Ned the Head. Come on, buddy. Case Western High. I did the whistling belly button trick at the high school talent show. Bing! Got the shingles real bad senior year, almost didn't graduate. Bing again! I dated your sister Mary Pat till you told me not to anymore. Did you turn pro with that belly button thing or what? - I sell insurance. - What a shock. Do you have life insurance? You could always use a little more. Am I right or am I right or am I right? Right? I would love to stand here and talk with you, but I'm not going to. - See you. - I'll walk with you. Whenever I see an opportunity now, I charge it like a bull. Ned the Bull, that's me now. I have friends who live and die by the actuarial tables. It's all one big crap shoot. Have you ever heard of single premium life? I think that really could be the ticket for you. God! It is so good to see you! - What are you doing for dinner? - Something else. It's been great seeing you, Needlehead. Take care. Watch out for that first step. It's a doozy! Strike up the music The band has begun The Pennsylvania Polka Pick out your partner and join in the fun It started in Scranton It's now number one It's gonna entertain you Phil, over here! Where have you been? It was horrible. A giant leech got me. You're missing all the fun. These people are great. Some have been partying all night. They sing until they get too cold... then they sit by the fire, get warm and sing some more. They're hicks, Rita. Did you sleep okay without me? You tossed and turned, didn't you? - You're incredible. - Who told you? It's groundhog time. On me in three. Two, one. Once a year, the eyes of the nation turn to this tiny Pennsylvania hamlet... to watch a master at work. The master? Punxsutawney Phil... the world's most famous weatherman, the groundhog... who, as legend has it, can predict the coming of an early spring. The question we have to ask ourselves today is, "Does Phil feel lucky?" Then it's the same old schtick. The guy with the big stick raps on the door. They pull the little rat out. They talk to him. The rat talks back and then they tell us what's gonna happen. Isn't he cute? You like your guys with prominent upper teeth? "This February at : and seconds... Punxsutawney Phil, the seer of seers... prognosticator of prognosticators... emerged reluctantly, but alertly... in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania... and stated in Groundhogese... "I definitely see a shadow. " Sorry, folks. Six more weeks of winter. On me in three. Two, one. Television really fails to capture the true excitement... of a large squirrel predicting the weather. I, for one, am very grateful to have been here. From Punxsutawney, this is Phil Connors. So long. Want to try it again without the sarcasm? We got it. I'm out of here. Prima donnas. Boy, take a look at this. - What is going on? - I don't know. Perhaps it's that giant blizzard we're not supposed to get. This is impossible. Nobody honks this horn but me, pal. Take this rig out of here. Commander, what's going on? There's nothing going on. We're closing the road. - Big blizzard moving in. - What blizzard? It's a couple flakes. Don't you listen to the weather? We got a major storm here. I make the weather! All this moisture coming up out of the Gulf... will push off to the east and hit Altoona. Pal, you got that moisture on your head. You can go back to Punxsutawney or you can freeze to death. It's your choice. What's it gonna be? I'm thinking. All the long-distance lines are down? What about the satellite? Is it snowing in space? Don't you have a line you keep open for emergencies or for celebrities? I'm both. I'm a celebrity in an emergency. Can you patch me through on that line, please? Can I have one more with booze in it? I like it here. Phil, are you going to the groundhog dinner? I had groundhog for lunch. It wasn't bad. Tastes like chicken. You two run along. Looking foxy tonight, man. Is your troop selling cookies again this year? That's so funny, Phil. What are you gonna do? I'm going back to my room and take a hot shower. Maybe read Hustler or something. Suit yourself. God! Yo, Mom. Isn't there any hot water? There wouldn't be today. Of course not. Silly me. Sweet dreams. Nice going, boys. You're playing yesterday's tape. Chapped lips. What the hell? Good morning. Off to see the groundhog? Think it will be an early spring? Didn't we do this yesterday? I don't know what you mean. Don't mess with me, Pork Chop. - What day is this? - It's February . Groundhog Day. I thought it was yesterday. Did you sleep well, Mr. Connors? Did I sleep well? - Would you like some coffee? - Please. I think I'll have a double. I hope you enjoy the festivities. There's talk of a blizzard. Do you ever have deja vu? I don't think so, but I could check with the kitchen. That's okay. Thank you. Will you be checking out today? I'd say the chance of departure is percent. Seventy-five, eighty. Excuse me. Where is everybody going? To Gobbler's Knob. It's Groundhog Day. It's still just once a year, isn't it? Phil Connors. I thought that was you. Don't you say you don't remember me. I sure as heck-fire remember you. Ned Ryerson? Bing! First shot right out of the box! How's it going, old buddy? Actually, I'm not feeling well. Would you excuse me? It's funny you should mention your health. You will never guess what I do now. - Do you sell insurance? - Bing again! You are sharp as a tack today. Do you have life insurance? If you do, you could always use more. Right? Who couldn't? You know something? I got a feeling you ain't got any. - Am I right or am I right? - I gotta go. Watch out for that first step. It's a doozy. Phil, over here! - Where have you been? - Rita, do me a favor. I need someone to give me a good hard slap in the face. - How's that? - Good. If you need help with the other cheek, let me know. I'm right here. - Something's going on. - Are you drunk or something? Drunk's more fun. Can I be serious for a minute? - I don't know. Can you? - I'm being serious. I'm having a problem. I may be having a problem. - It's groundhog time. - I knew you would say that. I really feel weird. Let's just do this, then we'll talk. On me in three. Two, one. It's Groundhog Day again. That must mean we're at Gobbler's Knob waiting for the forecast... from the world's most famous groundhog weatherman... Punxsutawney Phil... who's just about to tell us how much more winter we can expect. This is a riot. Isn't he cute? Yeah, Sport, I know there's a blizzard. When are the long-distance lines gonna be repaired? What if there is no tomorrow? There wasn't one today. Hello? Good morning. Off to see the groundhog? Did you sleep well, Mr. - I thought- Don't say you don't remember me. I sure as heck-fire remember you. It's me, Ned Ryerson! Needlenose Ned. Ned the Head. Come on, buddy. Case Western- Over here! - Where have you been? - Can we talk about a non-work matter? - You never talk about work. - We really have to talk. Come on. - It's a creative meeting. Forget it. - Wait a second. We've got work to do. I don't. I've already done it twice. When you get finished, meet me in the diner. - What's that all about? - I don't know. Prima donnas. More coffee, hon? No, thanks. Just the check, please. - These sticky buns are heaven. - Aren't they? Just put that anywhere, pal. Good save. Tell me why you're too sick to work, and it better be good. I'm reliving the same day over and over. Groundhog Day. Today. I'm waiting for the punch line. Really. This is the third time. It's like yesterday never happened. I am racking my brain, but I can't imagine why you'd make this up. I'm not making it up. I am asking you for help! What do you want me to do? I don't know! You're a producer, come up with something. You want my advice? You should get your head examined if you expect me to believe that story. Like the groundhog Phil? Look out for your shadow, pal. Morons, your bus is leaving. You guys ready? We better get going... - to stay ahead of the weather. - Let's talk back in Pittsburgh. I'm not going back to Pittsburgh. - Why not? - Because of the blizzard. You said that would hit Altoona. I know that's what I said. I think you need help. That's what I've been saying. I need help. No spots, no clots... no tumors, no lesions... no aneurisms. None that I can see. If you want a CAT scan or an MRI, you have to go into Pittsburgh. I can't go into Pittsburgh. - Why can't you go into Pittsburgh? - There's a blizzard. Right. The blizzard. You know what you may need, Mr. Connors? A biopsy. A psychiatrist. That's an unusual problem, Mr. Connors. Most of my work is with couples, families. I have an alcoholic now. You went to college, right? It wasn't veterinary psychology, was it? Didn't you take some course that covered this stuff? Sort of. I guess. Abnormal psychology. So, what do I do? I think we should meet again. How's tomorrow for you? Is that not good? I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank pina coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over and over and over? You know, some guys would look at this glass... and they would say, "That glass is half empty. " Other guys would say, "That glass is half full. " I peg you as a "glass is half empty" kind of guy. Am I right? What would you do if you were stuck in one place... and every day was exactly the same, and nothing that you did mattered? That sums it up for me. Good luck. I'll drop you off. - This thing sticks. You gotta jiggle it. - Come on up here. - My gosh. - Give me your keys, pal. Friends don't let friends drive. Stand up here. Take a deep breath. You feel okay? Really? You're all right. You want to throw up here or in the car? - I think both. - Come on. I don't think I should be driving. I don't either. Watch your head. Watch your knees. Don't break anything. All right. Let's not forget seat belts. Who else could go for some flapjacks right now? Let me ask you guys a question. - Shoot. - What if there were no tomorrow? No tomorrow? That would mean there would be no consequences. There would be no hangovers. We could do whatever we wanted! That's true. We could do whatever we want. If we wanted to hit mailboxes, we could let Ralph drive! - I think they want you to stop. - Hang on. It's the same thing your whole life: "Clean up your room. " "Stand up straight. " "Pick up your feet. " "Take it like a man. " "Be nice to your sister. " "Don't mix beer and wine, ever. " "Don't drive on the railroad tracks. " Phil, that's one I happen to agree with. I don't know, Gus. Sometimes I think you just have to take the big chances. This is the police! Pull over immediately! We're talking in here. I'm betting he'll swerve first. I'm not gonna live by their rules anymore. - I noticed that. - You make choices and live with them. My knee. Let me handle this. Three cheeseburgers, two large fries... two chocolate shakes and one large Coke. - And some flapjacks. - Too early for flapjacks? Rise and shine, campers! Don't forget your booties because it's cold out there today! It's cold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach? Not hardly. Slept like a baby. Thank you. - I'd love some of your coffee. - I hope- Flurries moving in later, but the blizzard will hit outside of town. Mrs. Lancaster, was anybody looking for me here this morning? Perhaps a state official? Maybe a blue hat, gun, nightstick? No one like that. Will there be? Apparently not. Hold my room for me, please. I'm staying an extra day. Catch you tomorrow, Pops. I like to see a man of advancing years throwing caution to the wind. It's inspiring, in a way. My years are not advancing as fast as you might think. More coffee, hon? Just keep it coming, please. Sure thing. Just put that anywhere, pal. Good save. Don't you worry about cholesterol, lung cancer, love handles? I don't worry about anything anymore. What makes you so special? Everybody worries about something. That's exactly what makes me so special. I don't even have to floss. What? "The wretch, concentered all in self... Living, shall forfeit fair renown... And, doubly dying, shall go down... To the vile dust, from whence he sprung... Unwept, unhonor'd, and unsung. " Sir Walter Scott. - You don't like poetry? - I love poetry. I just thought that was Willard Scott. I was confused. Do you think I'm acting like this because I'm egocentric? I know you're egocentric. It's your defining characteristic. Are you guys ready? We better get going to stay ahead of the weather. Thanks, Larry. Would you like a doggie bag? - I'll stay here and finish. - I thought you hated this town. It's beginning to grow on me. Larry, quit staring. These are excellent. Did you see the groundhog this morning? I never miss it. What's your name? Nancy Taylor. And you are? - What high school did you go to? - What? - High school. - Lincoln, in Pittsburgh. - Who are you? - Who was your senior English teacher? Are you kidding? - Your th-grade English teacher was- - Mrs. Walsh. Nancy. Lincoln. Walsh. Thanks very much. Lincoln High School. I sat next to you in Mrs. Walsh's English class. I'm sorry. - That's amazing. - You don't remember me, do you? I even asked you to the prom. I was short, and I've sprouted. Gosh! How are you? Great. You look terrific. You look very terrific. - I have to do this report. - Are you a reporter? I'm a weatherman with Channel Pittsburgh. I should have known. That's great! Maybe later we could- Whatever. Stay right here. Promise me? I'll be right back. Wish me luck. Good luck! Who's Rita? How should I know? Is this some kind of one-night stand? On the contrary, Nancy. I love you. I've always loved you. This is gonna seem sudden, but... Nancy, will you be my wife? Whatever. A gust of wind. A dog barks. Cue the truck. Exit Herman. Walk into the bank. Exit Felix. Stand there with a not-so-bright look on your face. All right, Doris, come on. Fix your bra, honey. That's better. "Felix. " "How you doing, Doris?" "Can I have a roll of quarters?" Ten, nine, eight- Car. Six, five- Quarters. Three... two- - What? - Did I bring out two bags or one? I don't know. I thought we were going to a costume party. It's like I said, I love this film. I've seen it over a hundred times. I told you to call me Bronco. Sorry, Bronco. My old fiance. They never remember me. - That will be one adult and- - Two adults. Who, as legend has it, can predict the coming of an early spring. The question we have to ask ourselves today is, "Does Phil feel lucky?" Rita, if you only had one day to live, what would you do with it? I don't know, Phil. What are you dying of? I mean, the whole world is about to explode. What do you do? I want to know where to put the camera. Are you looking for a date for the weekend? I'm just interested in you. What do you want? What do you like? What do you think about? What kind of men are you interested in? What do you do for fun? Is this for real or are you trying to make me look like a fool? I'm just trying to talk like normal people talk. Isn't this how they talk? - Close. - So talk to me. Let me buy you a cup of coffee. - And a donut. - All right. What do you want out of life? I guess I want what everybody wants: career, love, marriage, children. Are you seeing anyone? I think this is getting too personal. I don't think I'm ready to share this with you. How about you? What do you want? What I really want is someone like you. - Please. - Why not? What are you looking for? Who is your perfect guy? First of all, he's too humble to know he's perfect. That's me. He's intelligent, supportive, funny. Me, me, me. - He's romantic and courageous. - Me also. He's got a good body, but doesn't look in the mirror every two minutes. I have a great body, and sometimes I go months without looking. He's kind, sensitive and gentle. He's not afraid to cry in front of me. This is a man, right? He likes animals and children, and he'll change poopy diapers. Does he have to use the word "poopy"? And he plays an instrument, and he loves his mother. I am really close on this one. It's Phil Connors. Hello. Thanks for watching. So, what are the chances of getting out today? The van still won't start. Larry's working on it. Wouldn't you know it. Can I buy you a drink? Jim Beam, ice, water. For you, miss? Sweet vermouth on the rocks with a twist, please. What are the chances of getting out of town today? The van still won't start. Larry's working on it. Wouldn't you know it. Can I buy you a drink? Sweet vermouth, rocks with a twist, please. - For you, miss? - The same. - That's my favorite drink. - Mine too. It always makes me think of Rome, the way the sun hits the buildings. What shall we drink to? To the groundhog. I always drink to world peace. Can I buy you a drink? Sweet vermouth, rocks with a twist, please. For you, miss? The same. That's my favorite drink. Mine too. It always makes me think of Rome... the way the sun hits the buildings. What shall we drink to? I like to say a prayer and drink to world peace. To world peace. Amen. - This is wonderful. - Didn't I tell you? How do you know so much about Punxsutawney? I've spent a lot of time here. - Small town people are more real. - That's how I feel. Really? Would you like some white chocolate? - Don't make me sick. - No white chocolate. There is something familiar about this. - Do you ever have deja vu? - Didn't you just ask me that? People place too much emphasis on their careers. I wish we could all live in the mountains at high altitude. That's where I see myself in five years. - How about you? - I agree. I like to go with the flow, see where it leads me. It's led you here. It's a million miles from where I started in college. You weren't in broadcasting or journalism? Believe it or not, I studied th-century French poetry. What a waste of time. For someone else that would be an incredible waste of time. It was so bold of you to choose that. It's incredible. You must be a very strong person. People place too much emphasis on their careers. I wish we could all live in the mountains, at high altitudes. That's where I see myself in five years. - How about you? - I agree. I like to go with the flow, see what happens. It's gotten you here. It's a million miles from where I started in college. You weren't in broadcasting or journalism? Believe it or not, I studied th-century French poetry. You speak French. - I haven't done this since I was a kid. - Me neither. - It's fun. - It's good, clean fun. I hope that one day I can do this with my own children. Where did you get that? I went over to the snowman shop. An assassin! I'll protect you, Your Majesty. I shall die for you! You shall not take her! Find cover, my lady! - Nice arm. - I'm getting some good ones. There's a boy. That's a boy. Good try. - Got him. - Help me. - What? - I'm amazed, and I'm not easily amazed. - About what? - How you can start a day... with one kind of expectation and end up so completely different. Do you like the way this day is turning out? I like it very much. It's a perfect day. You couldn't plan a day like this. You can. It just takes an awful lot of work. Come on in. I want to show you something. - I don't think I should. - I don't think you should either. That's why I'll show you one thing and kick you out. Just one minute. It's just lovely. Would you like to sit and stare at the fake fire? It's really a wonderful room. It is now. I don't know. I don't think we should do this. I don't either. On second thought, I think we should. It's the perfect end to a perfect day. It's a little fast for me. Me too. Maybe I should go. Where would you go? Why? We've got a perfect fire. I've got some French poetry here. Baudelaire. I will read to you. I've got ice cream on the windowsill. Hold on a minute. - Rocky Road? - I love Rocky Road. I thought so. You have to stay. I'm tired. We can see each other tomorrow. Tonight. It's gotta be tonight. - Really. - Just stay for awhile. If you like it, stay for awhile longer and awhile longer. - Let's not spoil it. - I don't want to spoil it either. You know I can't stay with you. Why not? I love you. You love me? - You don't even know me. - I know you. I can't believe I fell for this. This whole day has just been one long setup. - It hasn't. - And I hate fudge. No white chocolate. No fudge. What are you doing? Are you making some kind of list? Did you call my friends and ask what I like and what I don't like? - Is this what love is for you? - This is real. This is love. Stop saying that! You must be crazy. I could never love someone like you. You only love yourself. That's not true. I don't even like myself. Give me another chance. That's for making me care about you. - I haven't done this since I was a kid. - Me neither. - It's fun. - Good, clean fun too. That's what's missing in the world today. I can't wait to do this with my own children. Golly, I want lots of kids! I want to adopt. I want to have my own. I want foster kids. I got this at Snowman City. Some kid threw a snowball at us! Come here! Let's have some fun! I wish these were my own kids! Are any of you up for adoption? Here's a humdinger over here! Wasn't that great? Stop it! Over here! Where have you been? You're missing all the fun. You look terrible. What happened? Rough night? Okay, campers, rise and shine. Don't forget your booties because it's cold out there today. It's cold out there every day. This country's largest lake, Chapala, is located near the city... - of Guadala Jara. - What is Mexico? - Correct. - "Lakes and Rivers," . Seneca is the largest of these lakes in West-Central New York. - What are the Finger Lakes? - Correct. - That's amazing. - "Lakes and Rivers" for . This South American lake drains into the smaller lake in Bolivia. - What is Titicaca? - Correct. - "Lakes and Rivers" for . - Milky colored... - from glacial clay... - What is the Rhone? when entering Lake Geneva, this river is clear upon exiting. Jim? The Rhone is good for $ . - you are $ off the lead. - Let's go to "Inventors" for . This is pitiful. A thousand people freezing their butts off, waiting to worship a rat. What a hype. Groundhog Day used to mean something in this town. They used to pull the hog out and eat it! You're hypocrites, all of you! You got a problem with what I'm saying? Untie your tongue, and you come out here and talk. Am I upsetting you, Princess? You want a prediction about the weather, you're asking the wrong Phil. I'll give you a winter prediction. It's gonna be cold... it's gonna be gray... and it's gonna last you for the rest of your life. Once again, the eyes of the nation have turned here to this... tiny village in western Pennsylvania. There is no way that this winter... is ever going to end... as long as this groundhog keeps seeing his shadow. I don't see any other way out. He has to be stopped. I have to stop him. Real good, Phil. He's crazy. I'm worried. I think there's something really wrong with Phil. There's a lot of things really wrong with Phil. I've come to the end of me. There's no way out now. I just want you to remember we had a beautiful day together once. All right, little fella. Good job. - He smiled at me. Did you see that? - I believe he did. Okay, little fella. There you go. Hi, mister. Something I can do you for? What are you doing? Jake, get the word out! Somebody kidnapped Phil! We're going after him! Why would anybody steal a groundhog? I can probably think of a couple of reasons. Pervert. - He must have just snapped! - This should be good. What is he doing? What can he be thinking? That's not bad for a quadruped. You gotta check your mirrors, just the side of your eye. That's it. They're chasing us! Come on, make it fun! Don't drive angry. Hot dog! There's no way out except the way we came in. We got him now! - What is he doing? - I don't know. If you gotta shoot, aim high. I don't wanna hit the groundhog. We mustn't keep our public waiting. It's show time. All right, on me, Larry, in three! Two, one. He might be okay. Probably not now. Nuts. Did you sleep well, Mr. Connors? Would you like some toast? - What's going on? - My God. That's him. He was a really great guy. I really liked him a lot. I'm sorry. What was that again? - I'm a god! - You're a god? I'm a god. I'm not the God, I don't think. Because you survived a car wreck? You ready to order? I didn't just survive a wreck. I wasn't just blown up yesterday. I have been stabbed, shot, poisoned... frozen, hung, electrocuted... - and burned. - Really? Every morning I wake up fine, not a dent in the fender. - I am an immortal. - Special today is blueberry waffles. Why are you telling me this? Because I want you to believe in me. You're not a god. Believe me. This is years of Catholic school talking. I could come back if you're not ready. How do you know I'm not a god? Please! Because it's not possible! - I'll come back. - Doris! This is Doris. Her brother-in-law, Carl, owns this diner. She's worked here since she was . She wants to see Paris before she dies. - Boy, would I! - What are you doing? - Debbie Kleiser and her fiance, Fred. - Do I know you? They're supposed to be married this afternoon, but Debbie is reconsidering. - What? - Lovely ring. This is Bill who's been a waiter for three years... since he left Penn State and had to get work. He likes the town, paints toy soldiers, and he's gay. I am. This is Gus. He hates his life here and wishes he'd stayed in the Navy. I could have retired on half pay after years. Is this some kind of trick? Maybe the real God uses tricks. Maybe He's not omnipotent. He's just been around so long, He knows everything. - Who's that? - This is Tom. He worked in the coal mine till they closed it down. - Her? - Alice. She came from Ireland as a baby and lived in Erie most of her life. - He's right. - Nancy. She works in the dress shop and makes chipmunk noises when she gets excited. - It's true. - How do you know these people? I know everything. In five seconds, a waiter will drop a tray of dishes. - Five, four, three, two, one. - This is nuts. That's enough. - Do you know me too? - I know all about you. You like producing, but you're hoping for more than Channel Pittsburgh. Everyone knows that. You like boats, but not the ocean. You go to a mountain lake in the summer with your family. There's a long, wooden dock and a boathouse... with boards missing from the roof... and a place you used to crawl underneath to be alone. You're a sucker for French poetry and rhinestones. You're very generous. You're kind to strangers and children. And when you stand in the snow, you look like an angel. How are you doing this? I wake up every day right here... in Punxsutawney, and it's always February . There's nothing I can do about it. If you still doubt me... in ten seconds... Larry will come through that door and take you away from me... but you can't let him. Please believe me. You've got to believe me. You ready? We better get going if we're going to stay ahead of the weather. What's that? Maybe it really is happening. How else could you know so much? There is no way. I'm not that smart. Maybe I should spend the day with you... as an objective witness, just to see what happens. This sounds like a science project. Concentrate. You gotta want it. It's more in the wrist than the finger. It's just gotta- Be the hat! Come on! Go! It would take me a year to get good at this. Six months. Four to five hours a day, and you'd be an expert. Is this what you do with eternity? Now you know. That's not the worst part. What's the worst part? The worst part is that tomorrow you will have forgotten all about this... and you'll treat me like a jerk again. - It's all right. I am a jerk. - You're not. It doesn't make any difference. I've killed myself so many times, I don't even exist anymore. Sometimes I wish I had a thousand lifetimes. I don't know, Phil. Maybe it's not a curse. It just depends on how you look at it. Gosh, you're an upbeat lady! - It's been a really nice day for me. - Me too. Maybe, if it's not too boring, we could do it again sometime. I hope so. You're still here. I thought you were supposed to disappear or I was or something! Not until : . You rat! I never said midnight. - You knew I was waiting for midnight! - Does this mean you're gonna leave? Good. I'm sorry. It's all right. You can fall asleep. I promise I won't touch you, much. That's all right. I'm not tired. What were you saying? I think the last thing that you heard was... "Only God can make a tree. " Really? What I wanted to say was... I think you're the kindest, sweetest, prettiest person... I've ever met in my life. I've never seen anyone... that's nicer to people than you are. The first time I saw you... something happened to me. I never told you, but... I knew that I wanted to hold you as hard as I could. I don't deserve someone like you. But if I ever could... I swear I would love you... for the rest of my life. Did you say something? Good night. Who wants coffee? Get it while it's hot. Thanks, Phil. - Larry? Skim milk, two sugars. - Thanks, Phil. - Pastry? - We're just setting up. Take your pick. Thanks. Raspberry. Great. I was just talking with Buster Green, the head groundhog honcho. He said if we set up over here, we might get a better shot. - What do you think? - Sounds good. What do you think? Let's go for it. - Good work. - Maybe we'll get lucky. Let me help you with the heavy stuff. You got your coffee. I'll get it. We never talk. Do you have kids? I'd like a piano lesson, please. I'm with a student now. If you come back tomorrow, I can squeeze you in. I kind of want to get started. I could give you $ . Come on in. Good morning! Off to see the groundhog? You think it will be an early spring? "Winter slumbering in the open air... wears on his smiling face... a dream of spring. " How's she look? - Great. - Thank you. Did you know he could ice sculpt? Not bad. You say this is your first lesson? My father was a piano mover. I thought it was you. I have missed you so much. I don't know where you're headed, but can you call in sick? I gotta get going. It's good to see you. Hello, father. Let's get you someplace warm. Remember me? Excuse me, sir. Are you the one who brought the old man in? How is he? He just passed away. What did he die of? He was just old. It was just his time. - I want to see his chart. Excuse me. - Sir! You can't come in here. This is a restricted area. Where's the chart? Sometimes people just die. Not today. It's hard down there at the bottom. - Here you go. - Thank you. Come on, Dad! Come on, Pop! Breathe, Pop! When Chekhov saw the long winter... he saw a winter bleak and dark and bereft of hope. Yet we know that winter is just another step in the cycle of life. But standing here among the people of Punxsutawney... and basking in the warmth of their hearths and hearts... I couldn't imagine a better fate... than a long and lustrous winter. From Punxsutawney, it's Phil Connors. So long. Very nice speech, Phil. - Thank you. - Thanks. - How was that for you two? - Man, you touched me. - Thanks, Larry. - Thank you. I gotta go. That was surprising. I didn't know you were so versatile. I surprise myself sometimes. Would you like to get some coffee? I'd love to. Can I have a rain check? I've got some errands to run. What errands? I thought we were going back. Hold it, fella! What do you say? You little brat. You have never thanked me! I'll see you tomorrow, maybe! - Now what? - You've totaled it. It's only a flat tire. Now just be patient. Just cool it! - It's an earthquake! - It's not an earthquake! What is it? Thank you, young man. It's nothing. I had the tire and the jack. Just be comfortable. Be a minute. Who is that? Must be from the motor club. - My God! He's having a heart attack! - What should I do? - Call an ambulance, a lawyer, a doctor! - Mom, I don't think he's breathing! I think that did it. If you're gonna eat steak, get some sharper teeth. - Enjoy your lunch. - Thank you. Who was that? I'm fine. - Are you sure? - Oh, yes. Eat. People just don't understand what is involved in this. This is an art form. You know, I think most people just think that... I hold the camera and point it at stuff. There is a lot more to it than just that. Would you be at all interested in seeing the inside of the van? You know, I really have to get back to the party. Great idea. I'll go with you. Let me just drop a tip here. How are you? Rita, this is Nancy. We were just going to the party. - You going? - Sounds like fun. Maybe we should call Phil. - I think he's already in there. - Great. - Isn't he good? - He's great! He's my student. I'm so proud. Thank you. Welcome to our party. - I didn't know you could play like that. - I'm versatile. It's that nice, young man from the motor club. - Thank you again. - It's nothing, ladies. He's the fastest jack in Jefferson County. What was that all about? I really don't know. They've been hitting on me all night. There you are. I never thanked you properly for what you did for Buster. He would have choked for sure. He may have. He was trying to swallow a whole cow. - I owe you one, buddy. - Hang onto him, dear. He's a real find. - What did you do today? - Same old, same old. Excuse me. Fred, how was the wedding? I just wanted to thank you for making Debbie go through with it. All I did was fan the flame of her passion for you. You are the best. Rita, this is Debbie and Fred Kleiser. - Here you go, kids. Congratulations. - What is this? No way! Wrestlemania! How did you know? We're gonna be in Pittsburgh anyway! - Thank you! You're a real pal! - This is the best! - I don't understand. - I guess not. How does everyone know you? You only come here once a year. You seem like the most popular person in town. Excuse me. Dr. Connors? I want to thank you for fixing Felix's back. He can even help around the house again. I'm sorry to hear that, Felix. "Dr. Connors"? It's kind of an honorary title. - What is going on? - I really don't know. There is something going on with you. Would you like the long version or the short one? Let's start with the short and go from there. Okay, folks. Attention. Time for the big bachelor auction. You all know the rules. All the eligible bachelors come down in front... and you ladies bid on them! You get to do whatever you want with them. No questions asked! I don't want to know about it, as long as it's legal! Get out your pocketbooks and remember, it's all for charity! What are you doing down here? Go on. Get up there. I got ten bucks that says you're mine! - Buster, I got your first victim. - Come up here! All right! What am I bid for this fine specimen? Five dollars! The bidding has begun at five dollars. - Ten dollars! - Fifteen! - Twenty! - Twenty-five! - Thirty! - Thirty-five! - Forty! - Forty-five! - Fifty! - Fifty-five! - Sixty! - I'm bid sixty. Do I hear more? Three hundred and thirty-nine dollars and eighty-eight cents! We can't accept any more bids. That's sold... to the little lady for $ . ! Congratulations. Okay, bachelors! Who's next? All right! What am I bid for this guy? Do I hear a buck and a half? Anybody? - Seventy-five cents? - I bid two bits! Sold to the lady for twenty-five cents! I got him! Phil Connors! I thought that was you! This is Ned Ryerson, my new insurance agent. I'll say! I have not seen this guy for years. He comes to me and buys whole life, term, uniflex... fire, theft, auto, dental, health... with the optional death and dismemberment plan, water damage. This is the best day of my life. Mine too. - Where are we going? - Let's not spoil it. I got that! - Why can't I look? - Because you bother me a lot. I'm getting cold. How much longer do I have to sit here? I'm just giving you your money's worth. You paid top dollar for me. I think you were a bargain. Sweet of you to say. You're probably right. - Is it finished yet? - Almost. I still have to put cherry syrup on top and then we can eat it. Come on! I'm freezing! One second. All right. Let me turn toward the light. It's amazing. It's beautiful. - How did you do that? - I know your face so well... I could have done it with my eyes closed. It's lovely. I don't know what to say. I do. No matter what happens tomorrow... or for the rest of my life... I'm happy now because I love you. I think I'm happy too. - Please, not again. - That is a great song! - It's not! - Don't listen to this man- It's too early. Something is different. Good or bad? Anything different is good... but this could be real good. Why are you here? I bought you. I own you. But why are you still here? You said stay, so I stayed. I said stay, so you stayed? I can't even make a collie stay. I gotta check something. Stay. They're gone! They're all gone! - Do you know what today is? - What? Today is tomorrow. It happened. - You're here. - I'm here. Why weren't you like this last night? You just fell sleep. It was the end of a very long day. Is there anything I can do for you today? I'm sure I can think of something. It's so beautiful! Let's live here. We'll rent to start.